Common questions about coaching
What this page is for
This page exists to answer the questions men tend to have once they’re seriously considering coaching, but before they apply.
Some of these are practical. Some are conceptual. Some are the quiet “yeah, but…” questions that don’t always get asked out loud.
Nothing here is meant to persuade you. It’s here to help you decide clearly.
How coaching with me actually works
What happens on the discovery call?
The discovery call is a real 60-minute coaching and mentoring conversation.
My goal is to understand where you are, what’s actually going on beneath the surface, and to offer support, encouragement, perspective, and next steps that help restore movement and agency.
It’s not a sales call. If we talk logistics at all, it’s brief and only if it makes sense to do so. If we both feel like moving forward is a good fit, I will send a follow-up invitation into next steps.
What does an initial 1:1 coaching engagement include?
If we both feel like we are a good fit, you will be invited into a coaching relationship that unfolds inside a year-long container.
An initial engagement includes a minimum of six one-hour one-on-one sessions (or four 90-minute sessions), along with:
- Access to my community, Masterful Men
- Access to Stages 1–3 of my core curriculum, The Masterful Journey
- Access to my peripheral courses
- Access to group coaching for one full year
This is not a requirement to participate in everything listed above. It’s my part of the commitment I make to you.
Some men use group coaching extensively. Some focus almost entirely on one-on-one sessions. Some move slowly through the curriculum. Others go deep early.
The container is designed to support different rhythms without fragmenting the work.
The one-on-one sessions can be used intensively over a short period or spread out across the year. Group coaching, community access, and curriculum access remain available for the full year regardless of how quickly the individual sessions are used.
Can I start with more one-on-one coaching?
Perhaps.
If you request it, and if I feel good about engaging for that long, and if you’re willing to follow through.
Some men know from the outset that they want more one-on-one support. In those cases, the year-long container still applies but may include more private sessions.
Those options are discussed on the discovery call rather than listed here.
What happens after the initial block of sessions?
After completing an initial block of one-on-one sessions, private coaching can be extended in additional blocks of six sessions.
This structure exists for a reason.
I don’t offer single-session or ad hoc coaching because the work I do is not remedial or crisis-driven.
It’s not a tow-truck rescue designed to bail you out of an emergency or solve something in one conversation.
The kind of mentoring and coaching I do is guidance through a season and a place in life.
That requires continuity, trust, and commitment.
This structure also ensures that I’m working with men who are serious about engaging the process, not dabbling or hoping for a quick fix.
1:1 coaching and group coaching
Do I have to participate in group coaching?
No. Group coaching is included, but it’s optional. Having said that, across the years I’ve been doing this, there is a clear correlation between men who participate in the group coaching and community, and those who experience the most favorable outcomes.
Some men use it extensively. Others barely touch it. You’re free to engage at the level that serves you.
Why do you combine 1:1 coaching with group and community access?
Because transformation doesn’t happen in isolation. Most men I meet profess a deep desire for connection, closeness, depth, and intimacy. But then live a lifestyle of avoiding the very circumstances and places that would bring that about. That’s kinda like wanting a vibrant garden without getting your hands dirty or doing any gardening.
The community and group coaching provide context, reflection, reinforcement, and most essentially, practice for the things men want more of. The community offers this in a way that one-on-one work alone can’t always offer.
The community is also where all of the curriculum lives, and where men see that their struggles are not unique or pathological.
This reflects how change actually happens, moving from external sourcing through thresholds and resistance, into transformation, and eventually toward internal authority.
What this is not
Is this therapy or counseling?
No.
I’m empathetic and compassionate, but I’m not acting as a therapist, psychologist, or crisis or on-call emotional support system.
Coaching here is focused on responsibility, agency, and forward movement. It’s about helping a man develop internal footing, leadership, and capacity to act, not primarily about symptom management, emotional processing, or diagnosis.
That said, many of the men I work with are also engaged in therapy or counseling. A common piece of feedback I hear is that this work becomes the missing link that complements those modalities.
Where therapy often helps men understand their inner world, heal wounds, and process emotion, this work focuses on how they relate to their lives, make meaning, take ownership, and move forward in concrete ways.
These approaches are not in competition. When integrated well, they often strengthen each other.
If you’re currently working with a therapist or counselor, you’re welcome to invite them to explore a more detailed explanation of how my work complements theirs on my page for therapists, psychologists, and counselors:
How my work complements therapy and counseling
Will you tell me exactly what to say or do to fix [insert crisis]?
No.
If you’re looking for scripts, tactics, or someone to manage outcomes for you, this will likely be frustrating. I’d also ask you if that approach has been working for you lately.
This work isn’t about helping you change the world outside of you to bring you circumstantial relief. The work is about helping you think, choose, and respond differently from the inside out.
This often involves examining how meaning is made, how shame limits capacity, and how dependency and enmeshment show up internally before they show up relationally.
Who coaching is (and isn’t) for
What makes someone a good fit?
Men who do well here tend to be curious rather than defensive, willing to sit in discomfort, and open to taking responsibility for themselves.
They don’t have everything figured out, but they’re serious about engaging the process.
Who is not a good fit?
Men who are primarily focused on, and/or waiting for someone else to change.
Men who want relief without responsibility.
Men who are not in a position to invest time, energy, and money into the work.
In those cases, the community or courses are usually a better starting point.
Practical questions
How much time does this take?
That depends on how you engage.
One-on-one sessions are scheduled flexibly. I recommend an initial cadence of a 1:1 session every 10-14 days and two or more group calls per month. I also recommend 15-60 minutes of coursework a day (5-6x per week).
Group coaching is available frequently (but optional) and currently happens at this schedule:
- The first four Fridays of each month from 3:00 – 4:30 PM Eastern
- The second and fourth Thursday of each month from 7:00 – 8:30 PM Eastern
This is designed to integrate into your life, not replace it.
Can I continue beyond the first year?
Yes.
My Masterful Journey program offers a second year (stages 4-5) that can be experienced with one-on-one coaching or only group coaching.
Additionally, standalone one-on-one coaching can also be renewed in blocks of six hours. Many men continue into a second year once they’ve experienced the work.
The questions behind the questions
Is this only for men in crisis?
No.
Some men come in the middle of a crisis. Others come because they can feel something isn’t aligned anymore.
Both belong here.
What if my situation is different or more complicated?
Every man thinks that. And every man is right in some ways.
The work isn’t about your circumstances. It’s about how you’re relating to them.
If you still have questions
If you’ve read this and still feel unsure, that’s okay.
You can explore the community, courses, or simply sit with the question a little longer.
If you feel ready to talk, the next step is a discovery call.